Tuesday, December 30, 2008

The Holy Crusade against the female breast

I was raised by very conservative parents who happened to have a very European attitude towards nudity. I know that makes no sense, but such was my childhood. None of it made any godamned sense. I'll bet yours really didn't, either. Be honest.

Anyway, I was taught that a woman's breast was just another body part, and not something to be ashamed or afraid of. The same for genitals and everything else which can be summed up as "human anatomy". Now, this doesn't mean we all ran around the house buck-naked all day. But when one of us would accidentally walk into the bathroom to use the toilet, and catch Mom just coming out of the shower, there was no freaking out or shouting or religious penance or anything like that. It was just, "oops! Sorry, Mom!" and the door got shut and we stood outside the bathroom door doing the pee-pee dance till she was all done in there.

I was taught to never be ashamed of my body or its various parts, and I was taught to never be embarassed by the body parts of someone else. It was actually quite relaxing.

However, I live in a country run by and populated primarily with childish retards. To prove it, all I have to say to you are two words: "Wardrobe Malfunction".

This is why I can't post my artwork on Myspace or Facebook, for example. Facebook has even gone so far as to ban photos of breastfeeding.

Why, Facebook? Why?

Yes, the same retarded social networking site that gave us all those fun and exciting apps and games which send us those lovely "Hey! Someone vampired your vampire's werewolf! Bite that chump and give them a beer!" emails EVERY FUCKING DAY have now decided that pictures of mothers feeding children is now the same as porn.

OH NOEZ NOT TEH PRON!!!!! OMG!!!

This is the point where the usual blogger calmly explains the error in this decision. I'm not even gonna bother. It's like trying to explain to someone that you shouldn't drive 80-penny nails through your nutsack or run over little children in the school zone.

It's just something you should be smart enough not to do already. Breastfeeding isn't porn, you dumb fucks!

Christ.

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